You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Randomize
