I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize
