one two three fourrrrnication!
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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