why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
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