I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
my mouth tastes like poor choices
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize
