what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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