i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize