If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
