The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize