3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I supernannyed him into submission
Randomize
