also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
