the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
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