Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
