Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Randomize
