I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
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