Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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