I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
