Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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