Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
