listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
