you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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