Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
