You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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