Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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