what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
