Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
