Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize