you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
