sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
