the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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