he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize