Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
