I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
