im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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