I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
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