that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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