So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
she looked like the before picture.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Randomize
