hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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