Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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