Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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