Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
