He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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