hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
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