Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
