I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
