It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
