Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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