i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
