where am i from again
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
So vagazzling was a success
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
