I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
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